Read Breathless 4 (Breathless #4) for Free Online Page B

first-time
driver.”
    I pulled onto the road and found the Interstate once
more and everything started to crowd in on me again. I knew I had to go through
with it; I just couldn’t pretend like everything was okay. I had to actually
talk to Johnny about the situation. Even if he had been sweet and loving to me,
even if he had given me several of the best orgasms of my life, I couldn’t just
ignore the questions hanging over my head. I turned the volume down on the
music and tried to think of the best way to approach the topic. I realized that
there was no really good way to ask the questions I had on my mind.
    “Johnny,” I said slowly. “I need to talk to you about
something.” Johnny smiled at me from the passenger seat, reaching out to take
my hand.
    “Anything, babe. I’m all ears.” That made it so much
harder for me to even begin. I swallowed the lump I could feel forming in my
throat.
    “What…what really happened to Claire?” my heart was beating
faster and faster. “I know there was, I mean…” I couldn’t finish the sentence;
I couldn’t tell him what my mom had said. Johnny’s hand fell away from mine,
and I glanced over to see that the smile on his face was gone, as well.
    “It’s not something you want to hear. It’s… it’s really bad, and it still hurts,” he said. I swallowed
again, biting my bottom lip. I couldn’t just let it go.
    “I’ve been hearing a lot of different things,” I said
slowly. “I don’t — I want to hear about it from you. I trust you. I’ll know
what to think if you can just tell me.” I glanced at him again and for a long,
silent moment, I thought that he was going to absolutely refuse to tell me
anything.
    Finally, Johnny sighed. He looked at his hands and
shook his head. “Claire was…” he closed his eyes and then opened them again.
“She was unstable. Emotionally, I mean. She was so quiet and sweet when I first
met her, the most beautiful girl… so smart, and even though she was quiet, she
was funny.” Johnny smiled slightly.
    “What happened?” I asked. Johnny sighed again.
    “She…would have these times when nothing would make
her happy. Not in a mean way, she didn’t fight or anything, she just…would be
crying for hours. Or she’d think that she was going to fail all of her classes
and have to drop out, even though she was an A student. Or she would accuse me
of being with her out of pity instead of love.” I nodded. “I don’t know what it
was; there was just something…broken, inside of her, you know? Then other times
she’d be fine and everything would be great. But I couldn’t keep us both
afloat. I couldn’t drop everything to be there when she needed me to be.”
    “That must have been really difficult for you,” I
said, feeling my eyes starting to sting. I saw Johnny nodding in my peripheral
vision.
    “I hated it, but I eventually broke up with her
because I could tell I wasn’t — I couldn’t fix what was wrong, you know?” I
nodded again.
    “What happened after that?” Johnny closed his eyes
again and was silent for a long moment.
    “She changed completely,” he said quietly. “She’d had
crazy periods before, but they were always depressed, you know? After we broke
up, she started just…going out when she shouldn’t, getting drunk, and flirting
with people in front of me, trying to get a rise out of me.” Johnny went silent
for another long moment, and I glanced over to see him take a deep breath. “One
night, there was this party. I went; I didn’t think she was going to be there —
there were a couple of other parties going on that night.”
    I gripped the steering wheel tighter. I knew this was
the important, but the worst part of the story. I had to listen. I had to find
out if I could trust what he was saying to me. “Okay,” I said, keeping my voice
as neutral as possible.
    “She was drinking and hanging all over my friends. I’d
had a little bit, but not very much. But Claire…she was