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Losing a hundred-plus pounds did a great deal to improve her self-esteem.
    â€œI don’t have anything to be sorry for!” Sophie tossed back. “Do I?” She glanced at Toots.
    â€œThe list is long, but it’s not for me to say.”
    Sophie did what she knew best. She flipped up her middle finger, directing it high in the air for all to see. Toots immediately followed suit.
    Exasperated, Ida said, “That’s exactly what I’m talking about. I’m afraid one of you will do this on live television.” And she pointed to Sophie.
    Sophie directed her single-digit salute directly at Ida. Whereupon Ida rolled her eyes and turned so that her back was to Sophie.
    Dropping her arm to her side, Sophie asked, “Do you really believe I would do this on live television?”
    Toots, Ida, and Mavis all spoke at once.
    â€œYou’re damn right I do!”
    â€œOf course!”
    â€œThat’s my Sophie.”
    â€œWell, I wouldn’t. I do have some class,” Sophie offered, her way of promising Ida she’d behave.
    â€œIt’s very difficult for me to believe that,” Ida said, a smile lighting up her face. “As long as you keep that finger where it belongs, and your potty mouth to yourself, you’ll be a wonderful model. You have excellent bone structure.”
    â€œMiracles never cease! The beauty queen has complimented Bernice, and now she’s telling me I’ve got good bones. What’s come over you, Ida? Are you screwing around with some man we don’t know about? You’re never this nice unless you’re getting laid,” Sophie stated, her voice laced with suspicion. She gave Ida the evil eye. “Are you seeing someone on the sly and not telling us?”
    Haughty as ever, Ida planted both hands on her hips. “If I were, you would be the last person I would tell. What I do in my private life is not your”—she glanced at Mavis, Toots, and Bernice, seated at the kitchen table—“or anyone else’s business.”
    Sophie gave her the finger.
    â€œSee? This is exactly what I’m talking about! You have absolutely no control over that middle finger of yours! I can just see it all now. Sophie in the makeup chair, a call comes in from a prospective customer, and she flashes that finger at the camera.”
    The outrageous image caused all of them to laugh.
    Always having the last word, Sophie answered, “Okay, okay, I promise not to flip the bird and cuss when we’re on television. Anything more than that, you’ll just have to take your chances.”

Chapter 4
    â€œA nd you’d better not smoke,” Ida added. “I’m quite sure they don’t allow smoking in the studio, either.”
    â€œFor crying out loud, Ida, if you’re ashamed of what I might do, then why in the hell did you ask me in the first place? I can take it or leave it,” Sophie cracked. “You’d think we were going to the White House or something.”
    Toots decided then and there it was time to put an end to all their bickering. “I think you two have said enough. I’m tired of listening to your arguing. Sophie, you will not under any circumstances cuss or smoke or flip the bird while we’re on television. Ida, you can stop treating Sophie like she’s an . . . igmotard. Okay?”
    â€œWhat the heck is an igmotard? ” Sophie asked.
    â€œI’ll tell you later. It isn’t very politically correct.”
    â€œSince when did that ever stop either of you?” Ida questioned. “You’re both known for saying what’s on your mind.”
    â€œOkay, if you must know, it’s a combination of ignorant, moron, and retard. Are you happy now?”
    â€œThat’s really bad, Toots, coming from you. Even I haven’t heard that one,” Sophie chastised. “If I had, I don’t think I’d use it. Too tacky, and cruel