the books, and keeping the bullshit to a minimum."
"What's with the set up here then?"
Blaze shrugged. "A couple of the brothers have gotten in on the action. They're legit pretty good, unlike Big Mike and his shit talking."
I remembered Big Mike , and couldn't help but laugh. Big Mike could barely walk a hundred yards without breaking a sweat, his gut hanging over his jeans. He was a walking fucking heart attack. He wasn't going to be doing any underground fighting any time soon, and we all knew it. But I had no doubt he would be talking himself up big time as the next big thing. Dumbass would get himself killed one of these days when someone called him out on his bullshit.
I watched one of the brothers go at the heavy bag, throwing jab after jab, his fist making contact with the bag over and over. It brought back memories of high school, of all the fighting I had done while I was growing up. That's what happened when you were white trash like I was. I'd been smart though, good with computers and figures- it's how I got away from all that shit.
But now, surrounded by the sounds of fists making contact with a heavy bag, the stale smell of sweat in the air...I clenched my fists at my sides, unfurled my hands and then closed t hem again. I could feel myself getting the itch to fight, and I told myself to shut it down.
But shit, on the other hand, all the working out I was doing now, the weight lifting, wasn't doing me any fucking good. Letting my fist connect with something might be what I needed.
It might even be goddamned therapeutic, I thought, smiling wryly at the thought of what MacKenzie's therapist might think. Somehow I thought beating the ever living shit out of someone else wouldn't exactly fit the bill.
"You want to give it a try?" Blaze asked. "Get in the ring with one of those guys, spar a little?"
My muscles tensed up at the thought of it, twitched at the idea of getting in there with one of them. It was like my whole fucking body was on high alert, every fiber tensed up and coiled.
Motherfucking right I wanted to get in there. But there was a rational part of me, a small part of me, that said it would be a bad idea, that I didn't want to cross that line, that I couldn't control myself, once I started. Just like it was with Tink.
For a minute, the image of Tink, broken and bloody, flashed through my mind's eye. I thought about how it had felt, smashing the sledgehammer through his body over and over again, first hearing the sound of bones crunching, then everything just going...softer...as there was nothing left to bludgeon into oblivion. The rage that coursed through my veins at the idea of what he'd done to my wife.
And the feeling of power. Omnipotence.
Did I want that feeling again? I longed for it.
I was afraid if I tasted it again, I'd never stop. I'd go over the edge. I'd need it, like some kind of junkie.
"Well?" Blaze asked, grinning. "It's pretty fucking fun, I'm not gonna lie."
I shook my head. "No," I said. The word came out slowly, languid, like I was forcing it. It was a lie, and we both knew it. I turned away from the fighters, looked at Blaze. "What's the job, Blaze?"
"This isn't the place where the fights happen, obviously," he said. "We're not set up for that kind of shit here. This is just for hobby purposes, training for the couple guys who are doing it."
"So it happens at Benicio's locations."
He nodded. "Yeah. He's got some warehouses he's using for it. Takes bets on the outcomes. It's small shit here, honestly, but the Vegas ones are getting to be more...lucrative. The chapter out in Vegas is acting as muscle at the fights, but he wants an additional layer of security."
"Cameras?" I asked.
"Something like the casinos use," Blaze said. "Eye in the sky or some shit like that. Make sure no one's pulling out a camera phone and recording or anything. Shit that would be used as evidence. You know how