Read Black for Free Online Page B

the smile, the smile that creeps up onto my face with the thought that maybe he cares more than he shows. His words don’t comfort me at all. They are the truth and they hurt. His actions, though, they are something entirely different.
    I ask him where we’re going, but I get no answer. It’s like he chooses silence over company, and I wonder if there’s anyone he openly talks to.
    He drives me to a train station and just sits. I look out the window and watch the trains moving, going either way. Some covered in graffiti, some newer. I open the door, turning back to him his hand slides over, dropping money next to me. I pick it up, knowing what I want to do with it, but knowing better. It’s time, it’s time I fight for me, for what’s mine. He helped me get to this point.
    I don’t know how he did it, or why he did it. Someone showing the slightest kindness has put power in me. I haven’t been shown kindness in such a long time and it’s taken me by surprise. Even if, at first, it was wrong. It worked, he worked.
    His hands go back to the steering wheel and he looks straight ahead, his sunglasses covering his eyes. I grab the money, go to step out, and decide to thank him. I turn and words fall flat on my lips. I don’t know how to, so I lean up, placing my hands on the seat, and kiss his cheek. He flinches, and his head turns to me fast.
    I give him a shy smile. My face is still very close, and he smells good, like the ocean, so refreshing. I could smell that scent forever and never get sick of it. I move back, open the door and climb out. I take a few steps to the tracks and turn to see if he’s still in the same position—he is. He hasn’t moved, he’s watching me, eyes still covered with his sunglasses. I lift my hand slightly, giving him a wave and continue walking away, away from a man who’s scary and dark, but so beautiful.

    The train ride is long and I sleep for most of it. A man haunts my dreams—Black. It was a pleasant change. Usually my dreams are terribly bad memories. Ones that got me into the position I’m in, in the first place. The train announces my stop, and I stand to stretch my legs, looking down at my hands and cringe. I’m so skinny, everything about me is. I was never like this, always had meat on my body. I had curves and good sized breasts. But it all seems to have gone.
    I catch a cab to his office. It’s still daylight. My best option is to stop in there, as people will be present and he can’t hurt me in the daylight hours.
    The cab stops, and I look up at the tall building, my heart beating furiously out of my chest. I haven’t seen him for almost two years, two long years of getting lost in drugs and alcohol. I wasn’t always addicted. I do, however, have an addictive personality, meaning I can fall into addiction quicker and faster than others. He knew this, knew so much about me. Used it all against me.
    Each step I take into the building is like a knife to the heart, each step as painful as the next. Will he even be here? Of course he will, he never misses work. It’s his top priority. Once I thought that was me. How stupid I was.
    Arriving at the elevator, I push the twenty-fourth floor while I watch people step in. Some look me up and down. I’m not dressed to be in a building such as this. I don’t have on a suit or an expensive pair of shoes. We stop at the floor just before his, and a woman steps in. She’s beautiful, and she looks at me with sorrow. I don’t want her pitying look so I glance away, avoiding her stare. My dress is too big, the shoes I have on just fit me, and my hair’s up in a messy bun. I shouldn’t be here. I should have come when I was better prepared and had worked up enough courage to see him. To stand up to him.
    The elevator dings, and the lady that looked at me smiles on her way out. She has on a business skirt which comes up to her waist. Her shirt is loose at the top and tucked in. Shoes are high, and her hair immaculate. I watch