overstepped the mark and Iâll have you banned from the next match.â The next match was of course the finals. But it wasnât that threat that pushed me over the edge. It was the term âlittle girlâ.â
âPatronising pig,â Tess agrees.
âExactly.â Her mum is nodding. âSo I marched back over to him and said, âLittle girl? Would a little girl do this?â and cracked my racquet strings over his head.â She claps her hands, amused by the recollection. âI ruined the racquet and was banned from the next match. In fact, I was banned from the club. But I didnât care. It felt so good not to be pushed around by someone overblown by their own self-importance.â
âDid you join a new club?â Tess asks.
Her mum starts laughing. âTwo, because the first club I joined had that useless umpire as their head coach!â
Chapter 5
She clings to that night as she pushes herself around the lake every evening and pulls hard on the oars every morning. Her mum is proud of her. She hoards that image of her mother, hair and eyes glowing, that beautiful smile, her musical laugh. If they could win this final, maybe sheâd help her mum to stay like that. The perfect woman she once was.
âShe was quite something, your mum,â Ned says one evening when sheâs finished musing over the fine details of that wonderful family dinner. As they run through the misty twilight, he is just a voice near her ear. âA real woman. Strong and determined. You could learn a lot from her, Tess.â
Tess nods but doesnât look at him. The comment seems slightly barbed. Is Ned saying sheâs not as strong as her mum? âI know. Sheâs what Iâd like to be like. Aside from the madness.â
Ned slows and she slows too. In the gloom she feels the scowl, his pleasantness evaporated. âWhy do you have to do that, Tess? Always bringing her down about something she canât help. Canât control.â
âI donât know.â Tess is mortified. Why does she do that? âIt slips out. I donât mean it. I just wish that things were the way they used to be.â
âYou want too much.â Ned pushes on. She hears his words float back. âTry fixing your own faults before you look at your motherâs.â
She sprints but Ned is too far ahead to catchâand anyway she doesnât want to. Sometimes she wishes heâd shut up. Lately heâs been getting on at her about everything. About her clothes, her hair and always, constantly, about her weight. Itâs beginning to feel like sheâs not good enough for him. Yesterday she weighed 52 kilos. She was so happy. Thin means fit. But itâs more important than that: it means reaching the goals sheâs set herself. But Ned wasnât happy for her.
âPleased with that, Tess?â heâd asked.
She stood stiffly in front of him and nodded, already feeling the joy slip away from her.
âThought you wanted 50?â
She inhaled slowly and sat on her bed, pushing aside a celebrity magazine. âI do, but itâs not that easy. Some days I feel so tired if I donât eat enough. I drink water but itâs bloating my stomach.â She lifted her top to show him, her stomach round and shiny. Her lip turned up in disgust.
âYou need to do something about that. Thatâs gross.â There was a shudder in his voice. âWhatâs the point of getting thin and fit if your stomach looks like something out of Africa?â
Tess dropped her top quickly, embarrassed and disgusted with herself, desperate to get his admiration back.
âI read somewhere that taking a type of enzyme helps with digestion. Maybe I should try it.â
âTry something, Tess. Or Iâll have to call you Big Belly Bertha,â Ned said.
Tears stung her eyes and Ned, sensing her distress, immediately softened. âCâmere.â
She
Tristan Taormino, Constance Penley, Celine Parrenas Shimizu, Mireille Miller-Young
Book All Tied Up Pleasure Inn