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soured by your experiences I didn’t mean it unkindly.’
    I did
, Coco said.
    â€˜Oh shut up!’ I realised I had spoken out loud.
    Bridget’s eyes widened as she opened her mouth then closed it again.
    â€˜Oh I didn’t mean you, Bridget, or you, Angel-face. I was talking to myself. I was telling myself to shut up.’
    â€˜You really aren’t very well, are you?’ Bridget said. Now her expression was all kindness once more, motherly and concerned.
    â€˜I don’t think I am.’ I turned back to Angel-face. ‘So really, don’t pay any attention to anything I say at the moment.’
    Angel-face perked up a tiny bit.
    â€˜Do you mean that? You really think this is all because you’re not feeling well?’
    I nodded, realising for the first time the joys of being Elizabeth Barrett Browning.
    â€˜I should probably go home and to my bed.’
    Bridget, still with that friendly, concerned look on her face, agreed.
    â€˜Shall I call you a cab?’
    â€˜Maybe.’ My voice sounded weak as I got up from the floor with my old woman’s scrabbling movements, I, who only a week ago could get up from a prone position to standing in one smooth go.
    Bridget turned to her daughter and a note of pleading crept into her voice.
    â€˜Look at Granny and Grandpa: they were happy.’
    â€˜Grandpa lived on the golf course and Grandma was surgically attached to the card table. Call me a silly old dreamer,’ Angel-face said, ‘but I was hoping for happy
together
.’
    â€˜And Aunt Hilary … no, maybe not. But the Taylors, now I’m not saying they haven’t had their ups and downs –’
    Angel-face interrupted.
    â€˜Personally, someone saying, “I don’t care if he lives or dies but I love that house too much to risk it in a divorce,” seems a little stronger than “ups and downs”.’
    â€˜Kate didn’t say that?’
    â€˜According to her daughter, she did, still does, frequently.’
    Bridget made a final stand.
    â€˜Well, take Daddy and me then.’
    Angel-face looked at her with something like pity.
    â€˜I think you’ve just lost the argument,’ she said.

Mount Olympus
    IN OUR FAMILY WE’RE always on the lookout for mortals who are an asset in our own particular field so when Rebecca Finch made it big with her latest romantic novel she really caught Mother’s attention. We began tuning into her life, checking that she was OK, that everything was running smoothly, and possibly to show off – to Athene in particular. ‘See,’ Mother would say, ‘just see how I’m worshipped. This woman’s work is read by millions of women across the world.’
    As I mentioned earlier, Mother and I could do with a boost. Our results have been pretty dire lately and it has become a talking point.
    Mother, of course, defends herself: ‘It depends how you define result,’ she says. ‘If you look at my ‘Profane Love’ portfolio you
could
argue that my results are up. People are coupling like never before. Adultery is perennially popular.’
    â€˜But isn’t it all a question of balance, Aphrodite dear?’ Athene has been speaking to Mother but her eyes are on Grandpa. ‘In your case the balance between the profane and the sacred, is that not so, Zeus?’
    Grandpa, as always, just loves being asked his opinion.
    â€˜Indeed it is,’ he says. ‘And I’m afraid that balance has been absent for some time. It pains me to criticise …’
    No it doesn’t, you old fart, you love it.
    â€˜But any fool …’ Here everyone turns round and looks at me, which I think is just totally unfair. ‘Any fool can get them to couple. It’s ensuring that they remain in a strong, loving and worshipful relationship that is the challenge.’
    â€˜It’s this “life meaning life” business that’s so