Read Anxious Love (Love Sick #1) for Free Online Page B

placed my hand over my heart. It ached to hear the sadness in his voice. "I'm sorry about your mom." I had read she had passed away his freshman year of college. His father had died when he was ten. He had no brothers and sisters. He had experienced so much loss in life. In light of everything, I felt bad about what I said as he was leaving.
    We both remained quiet for a while.
    "You still there?" I asked. My voice cracked.
    "Yeah," he said, his tone quiet.
    "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up a sad subject."
    "No, it's okay. I don't mind talking about her, really. I have a great family. My uncle is like a father to me, and my cousins and I are best friends. I try not to let my tragedies define me. Trying to change the narrative."
    "But sometimes, that’s all the people around you see. It's not fair."
    "Yeah. It happens. When my mom died, I got hurt in the first game of the season and everyone said it was probably for the best. I was the most recruited defensive lineman coming out of high school, but it was okay if I didn't make it because you know... his mother died," he said in his whispering announcer's voice.
    "Then, in my senior year, I dominated."
    I smiled as the pride in his voice came through the phone line.
    "They did this story on me for the NFL Network, and it was all about how I overcame so much and achieved so much despite losing my parents."
    "Oh, wow."
    "It's like all my defeats and victories are seen through this filter because my parents are no longer here."
    I remained silent. I didn't know what to say. I wanted to do or say something, but because of my own issues, I wasn't sure I was capable of giving him what he needed.
    "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring you down," he said.
    "No, it's okay. I understand what you mean. More than you know." I whispered the last part, but I knew he heard me.
    "Well, after I got drafted, I did sign a contract that paid me like a gazillion dollars, so there's that."
    I laughed out loud; loving the way Ryan defused the tension in the air. "That's cool."
    "I told you that because if I can't win you over with my charm and my good looks, I figured my money will keep you around. You know at least until the second or third date."
    "A gazillion dollars?"
    "Yeah." He chuckled.
    "It might get you to a fourth date." I lay back down. "After that, you're going to have to get creative to keep me around."
    "Any suggestions."
    "You're a grown man. Figure it out."

    I really was on deadline.
    I had used that excuse in the past to avoid doing stuff, but now, when I had a reason to test my courage, I had to get this book out to my editor or miss the window.
    Ryan called every morning and every night. We continued to get to know each other, sharing stories. Every day, he’d ask when we could see each other, and every day, I’d deflect the question. By the third, I heard it in his voice; he was tired of my answer.
    "Leah, am I going to have to come over there and drag you out?" He grunted into the phone. The sound vibrated into my chest. "You can't work all the time."
    "I can’t help if your timing is lousy." I wanted to yell through the phone, yes I can. It was because I was working on a new story that I felt calm and relaxed to the point I wanted to get to know him.
    When I wrote, I poured all my anxiety, nerves, and teary-eyed angst into my novels. It was what my fans loved most about them, and why they devoured them. As soon as I put one out, a day later, they were asking for another one.
    I felt the calmest when I was writing. Writing had triggered my recovery. Getting on paper the tragedy of my past allowed me to wake up every morning and take a breath.
    Hearing Ryan’s voice allowed me to breathe, too.
    "Okay, that's it. I'm on my way."
    "I won't let you in."
    "Then I'll break down the door."
    I sighed. "Do you really think this macho shit is going to work on me?"
    "What does work on you?” he asked, his tone more inquisitive.
    "Am I that big of a mystery?" I had been in my office