Read An Unexpected Cookbook: The Unofficial Book of Hobbit Cookery for Free Online Page A
Authors: Chris-Rachael Oseland
Tags: Cookbook
enjoy their bath, beat the butter, sugar, and molasses until they’re dark and creamy. Add the eggs and keep whisking until you have a sweet, soupy mass.
In another bowl, mix the flour, baking powder, ginger, salt, cinnamon, allspice, nutmeg, and cloves. Make sure your baking soda and spices are all well distributed. Otherwise, you risk having a bland, spiceless bite in one edge of the cake and all the cloves in a single bite elsewhere.
Once all your dry ingredients are playing nicely together, dump them into your butter blend. While you’re at it, go ahead and add the milky oats. Keep mixing until you achieve a dense, lumpy batter. Spread the batter in a heavily buttered 9 x 13 inch / 22 x 33 cm cake pan or fill three 1-pound loaf pans.
If you’re baking it as a single, flat cake, bake at 350F / 180C for 30-35 min, or until the crust is a dark golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. If you’re baking it as a trio of loaves, cook them for 50-55 minutes, checking with a toothpick for doneness before removing.
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VEGAN VARIATION
To make a modern, vegan version, substitute simple period almond milk for the dairy milk and coconut oil for the butter. To make up for the coconut oil’s neutral flavor, double the spices and add an extra 2 tbsp of molasses. Instead of eggs, whisk together ½ c ground flax seeds and ⅔ c water. Let that sit until it becomes gelatinous, then add it to the batter in place of eggs. The strong flavor of the cake will hide the flax.
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Leftover Roast Apple Bread
In keeping with the easygoing nature of Elevenses, this is a quick bread you can whip up using nothing but household staples and last night’s leftovers.
This is great the first day, but if you happen to have any leftovers tomorrow morning, try toasting a slice and serving it with butter. If you’re feeling extra decadent, butter both sides of a thick slice, fry it up in a griddle until it’s a deep golden brown, then serve it topped with a smear of Stewed Apples and Prunes (pg 17) from Breakfast.
2 leftover Roasted Apples (pg 131)
3 c / 375 g flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp cinnamon
½ tsp salt
4 eggs
1 c / 200 g sugar
½ c / 115 g room temperature butter
1 c / 200 ml whole milk
1 c / 220 ml heavy cream
To make this quick bread, start by creaming your eggs, sugar, and butter. Once those are a golden, sugary mass, add the milk and cream.
In another bowl, mix your flour, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt.
Introduce your dry ingredients to your wet ingredients. Keep mixing until the batter is barely lump free.
Now roughly chop up your leftover roast apples along with all their fillings. If you have any pan juice left from roasting the apples, you can add a couple tbsp of it to the batter for extra flavor.
Thoroughly butter up two loaf pans. Spoon a quarter of the batter into one pan. Top that with a quarter of the chopped apples and filling. Add another layer of batter then another layer of apples.
This creates a nice line of apples down the middle. If you prefer yours with the apples a little more integrated, grab a butter knife and weave it back and forth in the batter a couple of times. The goal isn’t a thorough mixing. You just want to muddle things up a little.
Bake your bread at 350F / 175 C for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
Small Adventure Sized Mincemeat Pies
These pies are a great snack for small adventures taken just outside the borders of the Shire. A hunk of bread, a little cheese, and 2-3 of these make perfectly portable Elevenses that’s just the right size to tide you over until a civilized lunch back in the comfort of your Hobbit Hole.
In the Middle Ages, mincemeat pies included ground beef and suet (beef kidney fat) as well as generous quantities of spices, the new novelty item brought home by crusaders. By Tolkien's day, the actual meat had
In another bowl, mix the flour, baking powder, ginger, salt, cinnamon, allspice, nutmeg, and cloves. Make sure your baking soda and spices are all well distributed. Otherwise, you risk having a bland, spiceless bite in one edge of the cake and all the cloves in a single bite elsewhere.
Once all your dry ingredients are playing nicely together, dump them into your butter blend. While you’re at it, go ahead and add the milky oats. Keep mixing until you achieve a dense, lumpy batter. Spread the batter in a heavily buttered 9 x 13 inch / 22 x 33 cm cake pan or fill three 1-pound loaf pans.
If you’re baking it as a single, flat cake, bake at 350F / 180C for 30-35 min, or until the crust is a dark golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. If you’re baking it as a trio of loaves, cook them for 50-55 minutes, checking with a toothpick for doneness before removing.
----
VEGAN VARIATION
To make a modern, vegan version, substitute simple period almond milk for the dairy milk and coconut oil for the butter. To make up for the coconut oil’s neutral flavor, double the spices and add an extra 2 tbsp of molasses. Instead of eggs, whisk together ½ c ground flax seeds and ⅔ c water. Let that sit until it becomes gelatinous, then add it to the batter in place of eggs. The strong flavor of the cake will hide the flax.
----
Leftover Roast Apple Bread
In keeping with the easygoing nature of Elevenses, this is a quick bread you can whip up using nothing but household staples and last night’s leftovers.
This is great the first day, but if you happen to have any leftovers tomorrow morning, try toasting a slice and serving it with butter. If you’re feeling extra decadent, butter both sides of a thick slice, fry it up in a griddle until it’s a deep golden brown, then serve it topped with a smear of Stewed Apples and Prunes (pg 17) from Breakfast.
2 leftover Roasted Apples (pg 131)
3 c / 375 g flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp cinnamon
½ tsp salt
4 eggs
1 c / 200 g sugar
½ c / 115 g room temperature butter
1 c / 200 ml whole milk
1 c / 220 ml heavy cream
To make this quick bread, start by creaming your eggs, sugar, and butter. Once those are a golden, sugary mass, add the milk and cream.
In another bowl, mix your flour, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt.
Introduce your dry ingredients to your wet ingredients. Keep mixing until the batter is barely lump free.
Now roughly chop up your leftover roast apples along with all their fillings. If you have any pan juice left from roasting the apples, you can add a couple tbsp of it to the batter for extra flavor.
Thoroughly butter up two loaf pans. Spoon a quarter of the batter into one pan. Top that with a quarter of the chopped apples and filling. Add another layer of batter then another layer of apples.
This creates a nice line of apples down the middle. If you prefer yours with the apples a little more integrated, grab a butter knife and weave it back and forth in the batter a couple of times. The goal isn’t a thorough mixing. You just want to muddle things up a little.
Bake your bread at 350F / 175 C for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
Small Adventure Sized Mincemeat Pies
These pies are a great snack for small adventures taken just outside the borders of the Shire. A hunk of bread, a little cheese, and 2-3 of these make perfectly portable Elevenses that’s just the right size to tide you over until a civilized lunch back in the comfort of your Hobbit Hole.
In the Middle Ages, mincemeat pies included ground beef and suet (beef kidney fat) as well as generous quantities of spices, the new novelty item brought home by crusaders. By Tolkien's day, the actual meat had