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been this mad….. not evenwhen my dad left our house and moved into an apartment….. not even when my dad moved to Paris.
    I was more confused and hurt then. Also, I was worried about how my mom felt, and I thought that it was my job to take care of her.
    This is different.
    Taking a deep breath, I try to figure things out.
    I’m not confused.…I know what is happening. My parents are very angry with each other. Max, who I’ve never seen angry, is angry at my dad. My dad is angry with Mom and Max. Sometimes they get angry at me because I am not thinking or doing things the way that they each want. I am angry at my parents and Max.
    I’m hurt…. but not like I was when my parents broke up. I don’t think that anything can ever hurt as much as that.
    I don’t want to take care of anybody…notmy mom…. not my dad…. not Max. I want them to take care of me. After all, I am the kid.
    Kelly and I get into her mom’s van.
    I, Amber Brown, have noticed that most families have vans. Mom and I don’t because there are only the two of us. Mom always calls vans “the taxis of the suburbs.” Even with Max, I don’t think that we are going to need a van. Only big families with animals need vans. Three people don’t need that much room. We don’t have cats. We don’t have dogs. We don’t have lots of children, just me….. and that is more than enough for a regular car. I like our car.
    The van is full.
    Darth Vader is in the very back of the van in his cage. He doesn’t like being in his cage, but if he’s not, he jumps around the car, licking everything and slobbering. Lick and slobber. Slobber and lick. People. Upholstery. Windows. He’s one very odd lick-and-slobber dog.

    The groceries are in the backseat section.
    Kelly’s baby brother and little sister are in the seats behind the driver’s seat.
    The kitchen sink is on the seat next to Mrs. Green.
    Actually, I, Amber Brown, am just kidding.
    It’s not the sink….. just a new faucet for the kitchen sink.
    We get into the section with the groceries.
    Kelly’s little sister and brother are in the seats in front of us.
    Linda, who is three, is singing
Sesame Street
songs to her Barney.
    I just don’t like that dinosaur, even if he is my favorite color, purple.
    Joey is asleep. Little bits of spit are coming out of his tiny mouth. He must be getting lessons from Darth Vader. At least he doesn’t lick, at least not yet.
    We get to Kelly’s house and help unload the car.
    Mrs. Green looks tired.
    Linda wants to show us how she and Barney can dance together.
    Joey starts crying.
    Before I remember how angry I am atmy mom, I think about how nice and quiet it is in our house.
    Then I remember how angry I am at my mom, and I don’t care to think of anything nice about her and the house that we are going to leave.
    Linda opens a box of cereal that Mrs. Green has just unpacked.
    Before we can stop her, she has shredded the box and there is cereal all over the kitchen floor.
    She really murdered that box of Alpha-Bits.
    That makes Linda a cereal killer.
    I laugh so much when I think of that…“cereal killer,” serial killer. Sometimes I really crack myself up.
    We help clean it up, and then go to Kelly’s room to do our homework.
    I write my thank-you note to Mr. Robinson.
    Kelly keeps writing her thank-you note.

    She won’t tell me who it is for.
    I look at her bookshelf while she is finishing up.
    Kelly has such good books….. we share our books.
    Kelly finishes.
    “Amber Marie Brown,” she says, “I want you to read this.”
    She hands it to me.
    It’s her homework assignment, her thank-you note.
    Dear Amber
,
    I want to thank you for being so nice when I moved here.
    I was so scared and unhappy.
    Saying good-bye to all my friends in Metuchen was so hard. I was afraid that they would all forget about me, and no one here would want to be my friend.
    I hated moving into a brand-new house and leaving my old one.
    All morning before my first day of school,