while before I can extract myself. All of these introductions are quite overwhelming, and the small talk is wearing me out. I’m desperate to be with my real friends. I
haven’t seen Jack for a while, but I find my British posse outside the igloo, sitting on the grass in a circle. I sigh with relief as I plonk myself down beside them.
‘I swear I just saw Ellie Tomlinson,’ Lou is saying.
‘You did,’ I reply, finally giving myself permission to yawn. I’ve been stifling them for ages.
Ellie is the daughter of Jessica River, a famous actress, and the younger sister of Jake Tomlinson, who’s just been cast in a superhero franchise.
I’m so past caring right now.
‘Courtney Victor’s daughter is here, too,’ Dougie says, nudging Aaron’s arm. ‘What’s her name again?’ he asks anyone who’s listening.
‘Sienna,’ I reply wearily. Courtney is a supermodel and Sienna is following in her mother’s footsteps.
They continue batting names around and I want to ask if we can talk about something else, but I don’t want to sound uptight. I catch Tom’s eye across from me and give him a tired
smile. His corresponding look is laced with concern.
‘
You OK
?’ he mouths.
I nod. A feeling of intimacy passes between us and I have to force myself to avert my gaze. Where
is
Jack? I turn and scan the crowds of people hanging out under the festoon lights and
spot him having a cigarette and talking to Lottie in her bright red dress. His arm is round her shoulders and he’s saying something that makes her throw her head back and laugh. He’s
cheering her up – I guess that’s a good thing.
I return my attention to the group and find Tom still watching me. I’m guessing from his expression that he’s noticed Jack, too. I wish I could explain to him that Jack has always
been tactile, that this is nothing new or anything to be alarmed about.
At that moment, one of the caterers comes along and asks us to go inside the igloo. I unenthusiastically get to my feet and dust myself off, looking over my shoulder in time to see Miles pulling
Jack away from Lottie.
‘He’s very touchy-feely, isn’t he?’ Tom says drily, joining me. I watch as Jack and Miles disappear from view behind the igloo.
‘Yep,’ I say curtly. ‘He’s always like that.’
‘Doesn’t it bother you?’
‘Please don’t,’ I reply, shooting him a rueful glance. ‘I’m too tired to argue.’
‘I know you are,’ he says quietly. For some reason, we both hang back from the crowds moving inside. ‘How are you feeling?’ he asks.
‘Surreal. I feel like I’ve stepped onto the pages of a glossy magazine.’
‘Tell me about it.’
‘Are
you
OK?’ I ask him worriedly. ‘I’m sorry he’s here, that you had to meet him.’
‘It is what it is.’ He winces. ‘Anyway, it’s only for one night.’
‘I wish you guys could stay longer,’ I mumble, hating that they’re all leaving tomorrow.
‘Do you?’
I glance at him. ‘Yes. You’ve all helped take my mind off things today, but it doesn’t change anything. It’s going to be even harder when you leave. I won’t be able
to stop thinking about her.’
A memory assaults me from out of nowhere.
She cups my face and beams at me as her light-brown eyes shine with excitement. She’s just given me tickets to see Noel Fielding, one of my favourite comedians.
‘I thought we could go together!’ she blurts out
.
I realise with a start that the gig has come and gone and I missed it without even thinking about Mum.
My bottom lip starts to tremble.
‘Hey!’ Tom says with dismay, running his hand down the length of my bare arm. But it’s not enough. I really want a hug right now. Before I can think about what I’m doing,
I step forward into the arms of the boy who was there for me when I needed him. And he’s still here for me now. His arms close round me and I squeeze my eyes shut, but tears still escape.
‘It’s alright,’ he murmurs, holding me