too much into shock.
âThat was a dirty trick,â Miranda said to me.
âWhat do you mean?â I said. âLook at her. What are her chances of getting a decent client list on her own?â
âNot to her,â Miranda said. âTo me. Now Iâm going to have to add babysitting to my list of things to do.â
âSheâll be fine,â I said. âAnd anyway, I thought you liked her.â
âI do like her,â Miranda said. âAnd she will be fine. Eventually.â She put her face closer to mine. âBut in the short term, I might as well be a crossing guard, for all the hand-holding Iâm going to do. Now, Iâm off to get your water bottle.â She walked out of the office.
I was going to have to get her a raise very soon.
Â
I knocked on the conference room door. It was unoccupied. I entered the conference room with the water bottle and the dolly, closed the door, and locked it behind me.
âYou have got to be kidding,â Joshua said.
Joshua had slipped back into the aquarium, which stayed in the conference room after our meeting was done. My job had been to find an unobtrusive way to get him from the conference room to my place. Carl wouldnât tell me how he had gotten Joshua into the building unnoticed, and he wasnât giving me any tips on how to get him out. Think of it as your first challenge, he said. Were I palming off the first known extraterrestrial on a subordinate to take care of, I think Iâd be a little more concerned.
âWe give you three hours to come up with something, and this is the best you can do,â Joshua said. âIâm not scared yet, but Iâm getting there.â
âIâm sorry,â I said. âI had to improvise.â I wheeled the bottle over and sat it next to the tank. I had figured that a five-gallon water bottle would be big enough to fit Joshua in. Now I wasnât so sure.
Neither was he. He extended a tendril out of the aquarium and sent it down into the bottle and waved it around, as if to check it for roominess. âHow long will it take to get to your place?â he said.
âProbably an hour, maybe more,â I said. âI live in La Canada. The 405 will be jammed up, but once we get over to the 210, it should be pretty quick. Is it going to be a problem?â
âNot at all,â Joshua said. âWho doesnât enjoy being crammed into a five-gallon plastic bottle for an hour?â
âYou donât have to stay in the bottle once we get to the car,â I said. âOnce weâre out of here, you can spread out.â This wrinkle in the plan was as new to me as it was to him. I had assumed heâd stay in the bottle the whole trip. But my car upholstery was a small price to pay for interplanetary peace. Iâd
just have to remember to get one of those little pine tree air fresheners.
âThanks, but no thanks,â Joshua said. âThe conversation where you try to explain to a highway patrolman why you have forty pounds of gelatin in your passenger seat is one I think weâd both rather avoid.â
I laughed. âIâm sorry,â I said. âIâm sort of amazed you know what a highway patrolman is.â
âWhy?â Joshua said. âYouâve been beaming CHiPs into space for decades.â He wiggled his tendril again, and then sighed. He must have picked that up purely as a sonic affectation because he had no lungs from which to exhale. âAll right, here I go,â he said, and started putting himself into the bottle.
He came dangerously close to filling up the bottle. In the last few seconds, a thought popped into my skull: Iâm going to need another bottle. It didnât occur to me to question the logic of that thought. He was gelatinous, he should be able to divide up. It became academic when he topped out about three millimeters from the top of the mouth of the
Louis - Hopalong 0 L'amour