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appetite decreased as her mouth went dry.  
     
    She needed to focus and regain control. Maybe I should call him back and tell him I can’t go. What excuse would I use? I could tell him that I’m sick or that I have heartburn. Heartburn would be a good reason not to eat spicy Indian food. Maybe it’d be good for me to get out of the house, though, since I haven’t gotten out in a while. Oh, who am I kidding? I never go out because of my anxiety. The heart palpitations, dizziness, and hyperventilation, are enough to make me not want to go out; I don’t need extra reasons. I should call him.  
     
    Realizing that she was over-analyzing the situation, she decided that she would go. She thought about taking an anxiety pill, but she didn’t want that one pill to lead to another, and another, and then onto something much worse. While she was in rehab, the counselors taught her a few techniques that she could use when she was in stressful situations. Deep cleansing breaths, plenty of water and trying to clear my mind. Yes, that’s what I’ll do because I deserve to go out. I’m worthy of going out to dinner with a friend. She slipped on a simple blue sundress and a pair of white sandals. Making her way into the bathroom, she applied an earthy tone eyeshadow and a coat of lip gloss. Staring at herself in the mirror, she realized she hadn’t worn makeup since before her son’s death. Maybe this is what I need to pull me out of my rut. I was never introverted before the accident; I always had lots of friends, did my hair and makeup, and was outgoing. I wish I could be my old self again, she thought as she snapped the compact closed.  
     
    Too anxious to wait inside for Chad to arrive, she sat outside on the front porch. It was an unusually pleasant August evening. The light, breezy wind was a refreshing change. Normally, the Kansas City summers were hot and muggy, almost unbearable at times. She soon found that her nerves were going to get the best of her no matter if she was inside or outside. Holding her stomach as she rocked in place, she began thinking about worst-case scenarios. What if he’s still like he used to be? In college, he was promiscuous. Sure, he tried to keep things discreet—so other women wouldn’t find out that they weren’t the only one. On the flip side, though, he never did commit to anyone, including me. She started to talk to herself under her breath. “Oh, maybe this is a big mistake. If he hasn’t changed, I can’t handle the old Chad. The one who would never make a commitment. I need stability right now. Perhaps he’s changed, gotten better with age.”  
     
    Chad’s truck pulled up in front of her house just as she was finishing her sentence. Crap, she thought, now it’s too late to back out.  
     
    “Hi!” Chad waved as he rolled down the passenger window.  
     
    “Hi,” she sweetly smiled back as she began the descent from her porch to his truck.  
     
    As she walked to his truck, Chad’s mind flashed back to when they were in college. There were many times when he’d go to the house that Audrey shared with three other girls, and he’d pick her up. He pictured her walking out to his old beat up car back then. How things have change, he thought, but Audrey hasn’t. She’s still as beautiful as ever.  
     
    “Did you have trouble finding it?” she asked looking at her watch.  
     
    “No, I was running late because I stopped and got you these.” He reached into the backseat and produced a bouquet of roses.  
     
    “Aww,” she said, “you didn’t have to do that.”  
     
    “I know, but I wanted to.”  
     
    At the restaurant, they enjoyed their meals as they reminisced about their college years. Both of them avoided bringing up Alex or any of Audrey’s past since college. She didn’t know how to tell him about Alex’s death. Every time someone asked her about him, she’d start crying. Chad didn’t want her to know that he already knew. He wanted to