was . . . letâs say corrupt. So as far as recent ministers are concerned, itâs on the whole best to keep off the subject.â
âPoint taken. But you go way back, of course, so a little idle banter about figures of the past is not out of order?â
âOh yes, I go way, way back,â she said cheerfully. âIsnât it awful? Iâve been married to the Civil Service. And even before I went up to university Iâd been a typist-cum-dogsbody in a government department. What a life! most people would think.Some would say hardly a life at all. Yet something in me right from the start said: âThis is what you want to do.â You could say that was me recognizing my own mediocrity.â
âNo one who knew you would think that,â I said, gallantly but truthfully.
âIâm not so sure. But I admit that there have been times when I have looked at the minister or the Secretary of State Iâve been working for and Iâve said to myself: âIâve got a damned sight better brain than you have, you pillock.â No names, no pack drill.â
âYouâve worked for practically everyone whoâs been anything in politics,â I said guilelessly.
âOh no, thatâs an exaggeration,â she said, in that downright, factual way of hers I found endearing. âBut lots.â
I had, I must admit, been leading this conversation in a certain direction.
âOn my first day at the Ministry you came into my office, you saw me at ray desk, and you were startled.â
She looked embarrassed.
âDid you really see that? You are a deep one! I could have sworn you hadnât noticed.â
âWhy?â
âWhy was I startled?â Her elderly face, framed by gray, undyed, and little-cared-for hair, became rapt in thought. âSomething in you,â she said at last, âyour looksânot your face but your stance, your way of sitting at your deskâreminded me of someone.â
âWho?â
She shook her head.
âOh, it went as soon as it came. As you say Iâve had an infinite number of men set over me in my time.â
âI expect if you went back over your career in your mind you could pinpoint who it was.â
I said it easily, but she shot me a glance.
âWho said it was one of the ministers Iâve served that you reminded me of?â she asked.
âIâd have thought it quite likely. I was sitting there at my new desk, the new boy, but I reminded you of someone in the past, sitting at that or a similar desk, and you started.â
She nodded, reluctantly.
âYes, I suppose itâs quite likely.â
âIâd be interested who it was.â
âGood heavens, it could be anyone.â
âGoing through them would be good preparation for writing your memoirs.â
âThatâs something civil servants never do.â
âNever?â
âNot usually, except in private and for posterity. Itâs mainly the more self-important ones who do that. This is getting a bit like a parlor game. . . . Though I said it could be anyone, I think we can be a bit more selective than that, because it must have been one of the memorable ministers you reminded me of. That rules out sixty or seventy percent of themâthe ones who sort of coalesce in my mind into an undifferentiated lump.â She paused, swallowed, then began. âWell, I started in 1962, and that was in what was then the Commonwealth Office . . .â
And so she started through the thirty-five years of her career in Whitehall and her bosses: names that had gone on to distinguished political careers, names that had meant something at the time but had fallen by the wayside through election defeat or sheer ennui, names that were just names.
âNow,â Margaret said, getting to the seventies, âwe can rule out the womenââ
âWhy?â I asked. âIâve no
Blake Crouch, Douglas Walker