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before. When I’d see that smile on her face and know that I was the one who put it there, it did funny things to my stomach. When I’d hold her at night while she slept, I knew it was right in my heart when it skipped a beat. And for me that was a first. I’d never allowed a woman to stay in my bed overnight, and I never slept in their bed overnight either. I know it sounds harsh, but I never felt it was right to give anyone a false hope. I was there for one thing, and most of the time so was the woman. But, Chloe was different. I even put a ban on sex with her. She’d been through too much and I didn’t want to complicate things in our relationship by adding sex. I didn’t want her thoughts and feelings being confused with a sexual relationship until I knew her head was in the right place.
    She’d been doing so well with therapy, and I’d even gone with her a few times. Her therapist cautioned our relationship, but wasn’t against it. She too thought waiting was a good idea until Chloe had really come to terms with her ordeal. But, now I’m thinking I fucked that up. I haven’t seen her go to her therapist once since we broke up. Between that and her weight loss, and the fact that she stopped going to family dinners, really scares the shit out of me. And nothing ever scares me. This was the last thing I ever wanted to do her; to hurt her so bad that it erased everything she’s worked so hard to get over.
    What am I talking about? I’m still with her all the time by tailing her every move. She’s not in any more danger whether I’m tailing her or by her side as her man. If anyone can keep her safe, it’s me, by her side. I’ve made a huge mistake. Breaking up with her wasn’t the best way to keep her safe. She belongs with me. I’ve fucked up her recovery and for nothing. She’s been broken by a man who stole her spirit, she’s devastated over taking another man’s life, even if it was the man who kidnapped her. But I… I broke her heart. She has nothing left to make her want to live. Oh God, I’ve made a huge mistake. I have to get her back. I have to get her to trust me again and to convince her that I will never break her heart again. Even if it’s the last thing I do.
     

Chapter 4
     
    Chloe
     
    I’ve come to a routine of going to work then Deuce’s. I stay there until two in the morning, and then crawl into my bed where I fall into a restless sleep and where my nightmares become reality. I stopped going to see my therapist. She just keeps saying the same things over and over again. If I have to see her face again, I think I’d physically punch her in the teeth. I’ve stopped going to family dinners too. I avoid the phone calls from my mother, and I stay away from the condo and Ava at all costs. The only person who I talk to is Savvy, and lately I don’t want to talk to her either. I just want to be left alone. For the most part with her though, she slides my club soda in front of me and leaves me alone. I’m tired of hearing her complain about her life and how she wishes she could have done something good with it. She tells me she envies me because I’m a doctor, and she has always wished she could have become a nurse. Why anyone would envy me is ridiculous. If she wants to be a nurse, she still can. It’s never too late to go back to school and still make that happen. I have no sympathy for someone who whines, yet does nothing about it.
    This morning I went to work, and I must have left my wallet at home. I don’t remember taking it out of my purse and leaving it anywhere though. So, before I go to Deuce’s, I need to run home real quick and find it, and hopefully I won’t run into Ava.
    When I walk in the door, I see Ava sitting in a chair with my wallet in her hand. The little bitch stole my wallet on purpose. I give her a dirty look and start to head back out the door. Savvy will give me club sodas for free. I don’t need this shit.
    “If our friendship has ever meant anything